December 24, 2011
This year has been a big blur. It seems as if it’s only been a few weeks long, yet I hardly remember any of it. How can time past this fast without me knowing it? Does this have to do with my age? Is this what I have to look forward to from now on?...years passing by in a matter of minutes? I woke up this morning and realized that I have been living with a teenager for almost a year now. (This could explain some of the blur?) This year we celebrated our firstborns 13th birthday! Is this possible? And my baby? Well, the last time I gave birth was 10 years ago. So, there is no longer a baby in this house. What in the world has happened here? This just can’t be right. And both these boys cause us to be filled with wonder and swell full of proud joy and I hold tight to the precious moments flying by. Savoring every moment I can.
A friend said to me at the beginning of this year, “2011 has got to be better for your family than 2010”. And a couple of days later, I got a terrifying phone call from Jeff- breathless and voice waning, I heard the words, “I crashed and it’s bad”. Knowing that he was at a motocross track that day with a friend and aware of his history of making jumps on his motorcycle that take my breath away, I imagined the worse. After hospitals, surgery and weeks of rehab, though it was tough, I’m so thankful that it wasn’t as bad as it could have been. But this was only January. What would February bring? To my shock and surprise, just shortly after Jeff’s accident, I got another phone call. This time, a phone call bringing the best news ever! Now I was hearing the words, “you have a daughter!" These are words we had waited to hear for a couple of years now. We finally have our Bella. Little did we know what was in store for us next.
After receiving an estimated time-frame of when paper work would be approved and travel would be possible we braced ourselves for a wild summer including a trip to India to bring our long awaited child home. In the meantime, we watched miracle after miracle unfold. The LORD began weaving different people into our story and we watched prayers being answered left and right. From bringing long sought out translators for Bella’s specific language that no one had heard about around here… to friends taking trips to visit our daughter with updates, pictures and videos...to God bringing in over $30,000 to meet our outrageous adoption costs to travel to pick up our girl. He was moving mountains and we were getting excited! Sweet friends showered us in June to help us with the many needed things to bring home a daughter while mom and I prepared a wonderland of a pink room for her and a place to forever call home.
And it all came to a screeching halt when summer came and went and we still had no daughter at home. We were given news that there were delays in India and paper work was not moving and it could be months. So, beginning in August we walked into a different kind of season of waiting. One that would bring so much heartache and hurt, one that would bring me to the end of myself and force to me to fix my eyes on Jesus alone. Waiting day after day, month after month, now no longer to hear words that speak, “we have a daughter”, but ones that bear news that we can “go get our daughter”. Knowing that we weren’t the only ones now waiting on this news, but that on the other side of the world waited another who longed for her mama and daddy to bring her home. This is now a longing and yearning so strong, that I eagerly awake every morning- before eyes even open - and reach for my phone to check for news that will bring two worlds together.
Yet we still we wait. But I know waiting is never in vain. God is teaching me even now as our family has transitioned into this Advent season and we have been reflecting on biblical History. “Advent.” The word comes from a Latin term that means “ toward the coming." I’ve been reminded of many others who long waited, yet did not wait in vain. Noah waited for the rains of salvation, Abraham waited to be the father of many nations, the Israelites waited for the Promise Land, David for a kingly throne as a young man and the list goes on and on. Ultimately they were all a part of a people who waited generation after generation for a LONG awaited and prophesied Messiah. A lineage of people who’s longing and yearning gave birth to the One who was to come. Jesus, the one in whom we now rejoice. Let’s face it…. waiting is very hard, and in a culture that has no patience to wait on anything, we as the Bride of Christ, now find ourselves waiting like the saints of old once again. Paul tells us, we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting eagerly for our adoption as sons. Romans 8:23
It’s no coincidence this time of observing Advent has caused me to shift my focus of waiting on Bella, to a focus on my waiting of my own adoption. So many similarities. Am I just as eager each morning that I wake up to hear news of our daughter to anticipate also the coming of the One who will soon come back for me? Even now He too is preparing a home for us. Jesus says, “And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also.” John 14:3 For our citizenship is in heaven, from which also we eagerly wait for a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, Philippians 3:20. It’s so easy to eagerly anticipate the glittery things this season brings. But I wonder if we are eagerly waiting on Jesus for His return? He is coming again…..and this begs the question, “are we ready”? What if each morning we awake with eager expectation of a new day with the possible coming of a returning King? To be sure, some have grown weary and have even fallen asleep and we may question why He delays. The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance. 2 Peter 3:9
Waiting on the Lord is never in vain. Our waiting on Bella has not been in vain. As the end of this year draws to a close, I’ll not only be eagerly waiting on our daughter, I’ll be eagerly anticipating the One “toward the coming”. I’ll be waiting on Jesus. Ready for His return.
Waiting on Bella to come HOME!